Long time readers of The Tales have followed the trials and tribulations of CJ the Dog. If you haven’t, the Cliff Notes version is that CJ doesn’t like getting his hair cut. He also doesn’t like the mailman or anyone else that walks, bikes, or drives past our house. And he doesn’t like anyone touching any of his stuff. Stripes reference. But I digress.
So for various reasons, we made our way to an appointment with Groomer #7 on Monday. Groomer #7 is a nice lady who does dog grooming in her home.
In less than five seconds of meeting this nice lady, CJ tried to bite her. Keep in mind, we were in her house. Undeterred, she asked if I would pick him up and hand him to her. In my mind I thought, “Please don’t bite me. Please don’t bite me.” I figured that would look really bad if he bit me, and thus harm our chances of a haircut.
But then some divine intervention took over, and as CJ wiggled around in her arms, he had a look in his eyes that he finally realized we were running out of dog groomers in the phone book. And with that, they descended the stairs and she told me to come back in two hours.
The longest two hours of my life. Except for the time I sat through “Joe Vs. the Volcano.”
Anyways, when I picked him up Groomer #7 said he had been a perfect little gentleman and said we could come back in three months.
As God is my witness, I tipped that woman more than I’ve ever tipped my own hair groomers. But to my credit, I’ve never tried to bite any of them.
CJ, left; Danielle the Dog Groomer, right. And no, that's not a noose around CJ's neck.
An historic event took place yesterday: CJ successfully underwent a haircut and pedicure (or is it peticure?). What made it historic is that it was the first time in four years that CJ has been to the same dog groomer on consecutive visits. Actually, we didn’t make the visit because Danielle the Dog Groomer makes house calls. So we both paced the floor waiting to see if she would actually show up. And when she did, we both raced to the door. Me to greet her, and CJ to bite her.
But a funny thing happened when he saw her and she greeted him with her English accent: he somehow recalled her from four months ago and gave her a free pass. To her credit, Danielle laughed heartily as she recalled her previous appointment with CJ. Within minutes she had him up on the table and I was out the door. Keep in mind that in the past I’ve been called repeatedly by dog groomers to return to the scene of the crime.
But not yesterday. In fact, when my work day was over, I returned home to find a very happy and well-groomed shih tzu. And as I looked around the counter for a note that surely would read, “Please don’t call me again,” I instead found Danielle the Dog Groomer’s business card.
See you in four months!
The "After" photo. A thoughtful CJ ponders the day's events. He also ponders the pizza box on the counter.
A Scottish Deerhound that goes by the name of Hickory won the Best In Show last night at the Westminster Dog Show in New York City.Â In what many observers are calling a surprise win, Hickory walked away with the top dog honors and also won a shiny, silver bowl and a ginormous purple and yellow ribbon.Â Way to go, Hickory.
I bet Hickory has never growled at the mailman, begged for popcorn or toast, or made a dog groomer cry.
And one more interesting side-note concerning the Westminster Dog Show:Â 49 of the 50 states were represented in the show.Â Guess which state didn’t have a dog?Â Wait for it…yep, North Dakota.Â If we needed a contestant, I would have been glad to prance around with my Shih-Tzu.
Ps…a very underrated movie is “Best In Show.”Â Check it out.Â One of the funnier movies ever.
I have a co-worker that forwards me approximately 40 e-mails each day.Â I spend half my time at work deleting the e-mails she sends me.Â The other half of the day I spend working twice as hard to make up for the lost time.Â Every once-in-awhile (1 in 100) she forwards one that is interesting.Â This dog video is one of those.Â Enjoy.
In related news, a Grand Forks dog was unimpressed.
Most of you may recall my dog, CJ, and his many exploits. But for all his idiosyncrasies, he brings very little to the table in terms of tricks or talents. Probably because he was home-schooled. By me. Anyway, if he could do just one of the chores this dog could do, I’d be satisfied:
A saddened CJ contemplates his place in the world.