What Are The Vikings Doing?

Percy Harvin

Sidney Rice

Nate Burleson

Randy Moss

 

 

 

 

 

If someone knows what the Vikings are doing, will you please let me know?  For a team with the most pathetic receiving corps in modern-day football, they sure are in a hurry to get rid of the only semblance of talent they have.

Are we supposed to believe that the player the Vikings get with Seattle’s number 25 pick will be as good or better than Harvin?  The Vikings will paint Harvin as a malcontent and a loose cannon.  And he probably has reason to be.  As he laid it on the line for the last three years, he watched as Minnesota gladly threw money at the Chicago Bears castoff receivers.  Money that would have been better spent on Harvin.

The Vikings are about $18 million below the salary cap.  It will be interesting to see what they do with it.  But for the time being, I will assume they are looking at the Bears roster and waiting for them to dump one of their pathetic receivers.

 

Random Thursday on a Friday

*Sorry about yesterday.  I spent the morning standing in line outside my Taco Bell to get a Cool Ranch Doritos Taco.  Let’s just say I was underwhelmed.  In fact, I didn’t even really taste the Cool Ranch.  As the kids would say, it was “Meh.”

*Reggie Tales shout out to Big Doug who’s kicking it old school in Stephen for a few days.

*I’d really like to see the East Grand Forks Green Wave knock off that semi-pro team from St. Thomas Academy today.

*Reggie Tales bonus shout out to Bro #1 and his better half on the anniversary of their nuptials in a couple of days.

*Aleve is the best over the counter back pain relief on the market.

Weird Hockey Fight

This “fight” is brought to you courtesy of the LNAH, which is the the Ligue Nord-Américaine de Hockey League.  I think we can all agree that the best thing about this fight is LL Cool J’s “Momma Said Knock You Out” being played at the arena.  The second best thing is the guy with the air horn.  I’d like for SSK and OWHG to provide some thoughts on this bout.

Random Thursday

*When talking about movies, why do people sometime say, “I liked the book better.”?  Ok…I get it…you read books.  I go to movies.

*Reggie Tales shout out to the good people at The Tavern.

*Reggie Tales bonus shout out to Jared in Neche.

*Lots of Internet buzz about Out of Work Hockey Guy’s movie review yesterday.  The words most often used are “brutally honest.”  Other words tossed around were “bizarre” and “interesting”.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower: Reviewed by OWHG

Editor’s note:  Out of Work Hockey Guy has had some spare time on his hands.  That, coupled with his love of movies, moved him to write a guest blog for The Tales.  I was pleasantly surprised when I received his review a day ahead of schedule.  What appears below, is real.  Enjoy.

First off, I am honored and flattered about the opportunity to be a
guest blogger for The Tales. Seeing how this came after only
commenting twice on The Tales, I feel like a young Vince Papale,
plucked from obscurity to the Prime time. Enough of that shrimp
cocktail, now onto the iceberg wedge of this five course blog.

“Perks of Being a Wallflower” is a coming of age movie about a
freshman starting high school in the early 1990′s. I think we all can
agree that those were the days. The movie stars some relative unknowns
so I wont get into the full cast but the lead of “Charlie” is played
by Logan Lermin and the role of “Sam” is played by Emma Watson who
played Hermione Granger in the Harry Potter movies. I’d like to point
out Emma Watson has aged wonderfully, and by that I mean I like her looks.
Paul Rudd also makes a cameo.

Seabass and broccolini: So I hear you at home, “But OWHG, why do I need
to watch a ‘coming of age’ high school movie sandwiched between Emilio
Estevez duct taping a nerds butt and Stifler’s mom sleeping with
Finch?”  Because it’s not that type of film you Load. Gone are the
hokey pranks laid out in the John Hughes era and the toilet humor of
the American Pie series. Now, don’t get me wrong, I loved both of those
genres, but “Perks” gives a fresh take on the trials of high school for
a kid who might not belong.

Cheescake summary: Movie is legit. I personally liked it more than
“Silver Lining Playbook.”  That might ruffle some feathers but I’m a
Lions fan, so screw it. Well directed and acted, kept me guessing the whole time and not at all what I expected going into it. So, if you prefer
the endings to “Zero Dark 30″ or “Lincoln,” this might be the one for
you.

Cocktail wrap-up: on a scale of 1 to 5, “Multiplicity” being 0 and “Bill
and Ted’s Excellent Adventure” being 5:  4.5
Snack recommendation for home viewing: a few casual Coors Lights and Cheddar Cheese and Sour Cream Ruffles.

Big Day Tomorrow On The Tales

Recently, my other job has been requiring more of my attention than normal.  Sensing my stress level rising, Summer Sidekick volunteered to write a guest blog for The Tales.  You will recall SSK shredded “Gangster Squad” to pieces.

Now, Out of Work Hockey Guy has arisen from his slumber and has thrown his hat into the ring.  He has volunteered (volunteered = unpaid) to write a review of “The Perks of Being a Wallflower.”  I’ve never actually heard of the movie and I hope this isn’t some elaborate hoax he’s concocted during his time off.  OWHG movie tastes range from “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure” to “Les Miserables.”  So, suffice it to say, this should be interesting.  OWHG works in the West Coast office of The Tales, so if he submits his work by noon Central tomorrow, let’s consider it an upset.

Random Thursday

*I hear a storm is going to hit near Omaha and the lower Midwest.

*I keep one eye on the Minnesota Gophers basketball team.  How could a team with so much alleged talent be so mediocre?

*I hope we skip this Monday’s blizzard.  I fear the local newspaper is running out of names.

*Reggie Tales shout out to Richy in Felton.

*My Roomba knows seven languages.  I’m not making that up.  My favorite is when it speaks German to me.  It sounds mad.

*I think I’ve seen every movie I intended to see for the time being.  And even a couple I didn’t intend to see.  I actually went to a movie called “Mama” recently.  It is the first “scary” movie I’ve gone to since “Misery.”  Remember when Kathy Bates hobbled that one guy?  That was scary.

 

Side Effects: Reviewed

The other night I went to a movie I knew absolutely nothing about nor had ever heard of.  Sometimes I do that.  It’s pretty hard to be disappointed if you don’t have any expectations.  Well, I did have one expectation.  I expected my invention of combing popcorn and Peanut Butter M&Ms to taste really good. Mission accomplished.

Anyways, I went to “Side Effects.”  Jude Law and Catherine Zeta-Jones are in it.  So is Channing Tatum.  Or is Tatum Channing?  I can never remember.  Whatever, he didn’t need to learn very many lines because he’s not in it very long (spoiler alert.)  Maybe I should have put the spoiler alert at the beginning of the sentence.  I will let history decide that.

Anywho, I loved this movie.  It’s gripping, smart, moving and plausible.  I guess I don’t know a lot about Jude Law but he was enjoyable as a psychiatrist caught in the middle of some shenanigans.

If you need car crashes, explosions, and chase scenes, skip this movie.  If you want a witty film where you find yourself trying to figure out the “end game,” check it out.  Definitely worth it.

Side Effects 3 out of 5 stars

Diet Coke, Popcorn, Peanut M&Ms

Random Thursday

*Happy Thursday!

*Rain Man and Mrs. Rain Man went to “Identity Theft” last night and they loved it.  “Identity Theft is a must see movie,” said Rain Man.  He continued, “It’s a 4 Skittle kind of a movie…that good.”  Keep in mind that the Rain People thought “Ted” was waaaay funnier than it really was.

*Reggie Tales shout out to Ron at the North End.

*I’m probably going to do a surprise movie review tomorrow.

*I’m fixin’ on going to George Strait on Saturday night with the Good Doctor, Hot Dog John: Straight outta Fosston, and his baby brother.  Should be fun.  I reckon I won’t wear a cowboy hat.