I have a friend who admits to eating approximately 5,000 Laffy Taffys in her lifetime.Â If she admits to 5,000, I assume it’s probably closer to 10,000.Â An intervention is just around the corner.Â “There’s a lot of people who love you like crazy in this room, and they just want to see you get better.”Â For those of you that watch A & E’s “Intervention,” you will get that reference to my favorite interventionist, Jeff VanVonderen.Â That’s his catch-phrase.Â But I digress.
This weekend, I ate my first Laffy Taffy.Â Ever. It was the green one.Â And I think I’ve been missing out.Â Much like I missed out on Cheese Cake (yes, I capitalized it) and Red Velvet for much of my life.Â I’m not sure why I’ve never eaten a Laffy Taffy until Saturday night, but it might have something to do with confusing it with a Charleston Chew, of which I’m not a fan.Â And to make matters worse, apparently there are TWO jokes on every Laffy Taffy!Â Granted, they are not funny and seem to have been written by 2nd Graders, but they do work in a pinch.Â Now, to you long-time Laffy Taffy fans, I’m not breaking any real news here, but I did not know where to find the answer to the jokes.Â I bet I flipped that little wrapper over nine times before I realized it was ‘under the flap’.Â It reminded me of the piece of paper with “How do you keep a moron in suspense?” written on one side.Â “For answer, turn paper over.”Â When you turned it over, it said, “How do you keep a moron in suspense?Â For answer, turn paper over.”Â For the record, I only turned the paper over five times.
Anyway, one of the jokes was, “What kind of key won’t open any door?”Â A don-key. Joke bad, Laffy Taffy good.Â Now, to make up for lost time.